“I was wondering if we could do something for ________ for Christmas.”
As we ate breakfast, Hollis was telling me about a classmate he knew very little about except from the conversations they’d had in class…hopefully when the teacher wasn’t talking. He knew the classmate worked three different jobs and occasionally had difficulty getting homework done due to limited time. They had been discussing Christmas and when Hollis asked him what he was going to get for Christmas the classmate told him, “Probably some candy”. What a punch in the gut. As I was tracking the delivery of a pricey pair of shoes, which wasn’t the only gift Hollis would receive, he had classmates getting candy.
I was wrecked.
I wanted to unwrap every gift under the tree from their coordinating papers and perfectly tied bows. I left the house to run an errand and cried the entire time. My tears had purpose and had been under construction for quite some time. God has been walking me through a season of conviction and opening my eyes to the Babylon in which we live. Excess of all kinds at our fingertips that is just a few clicks away.
RUN!
Restocked!
You don’t want to miss this!
You can’t do winter without ______!
Hurry! These WILL sell out!
Don’t sleep on these!
I have these in every color!
Everyone should have at least one!
These _____ are so good.
I‘m sure if you are on social media you have heard or seen at least one if not all of these. It’s like the big book of toys that came out once a year at Christmas that I’d look through as a little girl to help me in creating my letter to Santa. Only now that book is digital and somehow keeps track of what I’ve looked at, my interests, and where I spend money so that I am even MORE of a target of the influencing. Aside from algorithms that are way smarter than I am, there is just so much at our fingertips and the message is…we need it all. Texts everyday with sale info, new arrivals, and must haves. Admittedly, I love to shop and I love fashion but what God has made me keenly aware of in this season is too much to ignore. The king’s table. Not Christ’s, but Nebuchadnezzar’s. A table filled with any and everything that anyone could desire, and I can have as much as I want. OR, I can choose to be a modern day Daniel and decline Babylon’s best and refuse to be influenced by it all.
“But Daniel resolved not to defile himself…” Daniel 1:8 reads.
And this is exactly what God has been speaking to my heart. **PLEASE hear me here.** I think it’s quite fun to share a great deal with my friends and help them save money on something that’s fabulous. In fact I’ve loved a product in the past so much that I shared it and quickly found myself managing a 7 figure business. I’ve also found help for my health by following an account who shared diet, recipes, and supplements that were exactly what I was needing. The bottom line is…when God convicts me I have to pay attention. “Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things” is stated in Colassians 2:20 and it stares me down every day from a notecard placed strategically on my desk because my eyes have a tendency to get caught on the shiny things of this earth. Maybe some of my revelation can also help you in some way. You may not struggle with buying all the things, but your self-esteem may be damaged from comparing yourself to intentionally designed and crafted content. There is so much that one could unpack here from healthy and helpful to extremely damaging, and at the end of the day we must base our decisions on scripture and God’s leading.
In this season of God walking me through a heightened awareness of the Babylon surrounding me, I have made a few changes in monthly spending. Having my nails done and getting pedicures were one of those changes. Now, there is absolutely nothing wrong with either of these things, but for me I felt it necessary to relinquish the trip to the salon every 6 weeks in obedience to God’s leading. (I’m only sharing this info for one reason, stick with me!) I have had the same sweet nail tech for at least 14 years. I’ve followed her through moves to 4 different salons because she is that good. About 2 years ago she moved further away from my home, further south in the city but she was worth the distance. True story…I didn’t even know the name of her current salon, the same place I darkened the doors every 6 weeks for 2 years.
No back to my errands…in tears.
They took me right by the nail salon. As I passed, I glanced at the name hanging over the entrance. Not on purpose as if I wanted to know the name and was searching for it. My eyes just landed on it as God would have it on this particular day. The sign was large and very difficult to NOT see. I’m not sure how I missed it for all these months when it was right in front of me. Through my tears I read it. Indulge. My heart sank and at that moment I leaned into God. Repentant and full of grief over how I’d personally allowed Babylon to creep into my life. My heart was so broken for a child who would get only candy at Christmas and yet I had taken a seat at the table in Babylon and stayed there far too long indulging on all the delicacies, and often times taking a second helping!
The world seemed to stop and I was left disgusted with myself, my choices.
We all have areas in life in which we must be careful, or we lose ourselves. For some it may be a happy hour that can’t happen because addiction looms at the door. For others there is a relationship that must stay at a distance because of the temptation it holds. When gossip has run you into the ditch one too many times, spending time in the break room with coworkers who fuel conversations about others may not be the best choice. Choice is the key word because it’s something we ALL have. For me, I must choose to stay away from comparison and not in a way where I’m striving to be more or better than someone else. It is a comparison in general to what I see and then turn that mirror on myself and what I have or don’t have. After a lot of focus on this tendency, I also realized a certain happiness and satisfaction comes from getting new things…but neither were lasting or real or what my soul was created for.
It’s about what I THINK will bring me satisfaction.
I’ve shared that I love fashion of all kinds. I just do…and I realize this affection is not bad, but it is MY area where I can be tempted to go beyond what is necessary. To indulge. If I sit in my home surrounded by current furnishings, I’m happy. There is history and love and laughter that has soaked into the very fibers of our furniture and is a part of the finish on the cabinets where the tiny hands of all 3 of my children have touched while steadying themselves to stand or just reaching for the treasures hidden inside. I LOVE that my husband laid the stone himself on our fireplace and in our kitchen. My heart is attached to so much about our home, but when I open social media and see the newest and latest trends of colors and fabric and décor, I begin to look at my home differently. It begins to feel outdated and in need of touch ups and so I start following links and 3 clicks later I’ve spent money on something I didn’t need only to have my mantle look like every other account I follow (and even ones I don’t follow thanks to sponsored ads!). Same with haircare products and make-up and clothes and just fill in the blank. It goes beyond shopping for just household products and fashion. I see families taking trips and doing allllll the things and then I feel like less of a mom because we aren’t doing this or going there. When my eyes are on other’s products, homes, trips and lives what surrounds me becomes less fulfilling somehow. Babylon looks like a much better place to live. God had a very good reason for telling us to keep our eyes on Him.
O.k. Let me say this again with emphasis. I’m NOT saying it’s bad to get your nails done or shop or go on trips, nor is it wrong to promote all of these things…but for me, God was spelling it out (literally) and it was symbolic of the way in which I’d lost focus. My own way of handling all of this had become sinful. I had indulged in the culture. Following links and Prime delivery were too common for me over the past few years. Hebrews 12 tells us to fix our eyes on Jesus and throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles us. Boy had I ever been entangled.
But somehow, when my focus is realigned, and my eyes are on Jesus…what I have becomes MORE than enough.
Our home is just that. A home. Not a house longing to be furnished with the latest and greatest, but a place God has protected and provided for over 18 years. Home. Where our closets are full and maybe not Insta or TikTok worthy, but we have an abundance. I may not be able to create reels and compete with all of the fun things that capture the world’s attention, but gosh my heart is so full thanks to God and his enlightenment. (Ephesians 1:17) I’ve also realized that when I find myself in a place of gratitude and my prayers are full of thanksgiving, I’m not falling for the newest trend or feel the need to be influenced into a purchase that will at some point lack luster and leave me searching for another something new.
Hollis wound up gifting his classmate just before school was out for the holidays, but what happened in return shook me even more. It was a short day, and the kids who had met the requirements for exemption only had to arrive on time and hang tight for 15 minutes to be counted present for the day and then they could leave. Although he wasn’t in the same class for the attendance reporting, Hollis’s friend found him and gave him warm brownies along with his favorite sodas. Hollis had enjoyed these same brownies when his classmate brought them for a school party, so he woke up early and made him a batch. It wasn’t the latest and greatest gift being shared on social media, the presentation was simple and far from going viral, but it was from the heart and probably one of the most thoughtful gestures Hollis has ever received.
I still have much to work on with regards to indulging and paying attention to what I’m paying attention to, but I am set on one thing in this coming year…my money and efforts are better spent on a batch of brownies than anything I’m told I “don’t want to miss”. Chances are Hollis’s classmate will never forget how he felt receiving the gift, and I know Hollis will never forget how the brownies made him feel…nor will I. Instead of accumulating things we don’t need, spending time comparing our lives, or (you fill in the blank of where your own struggle with today’s society might take you)…let’s all commit to making brownies and sharing them! I’m certain we won’t walk away disappointed, and we will have a lot of people around us feeling loved. Now that’s something I don’t want to sleep on! 😉
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